Confusing things about British Culture

 I feel like I do pretty well with this stuff, I stay up to date on politics and media and all of that as best as I can. Regardless, there are some things I just don’t understand about British culture. 

 

1)    Who is Gemma Collins? She seems to be everywhere and nowhere at once. Does she even actually exist? I’ve heard her name a million times, but I’ve never seen proof that she’s a real person. 

2)    Why do politicians boo each other? Even school children know not to do that! Watching any video from the houses of Parliament just shocks me every time. I get being angry about politics but just wait your turn. 

3)    Being incredibly polite. This one is really lovely, so I guess it’s less confusing, but this still doesn’t come quite naturally to me. Waving at cars when they stop at zebra crossings, thanking the bus driver, calling people “hun” – all very sweet things, all still a bit strange.

 

4)    Ending texts with x. Why all the kisses! This still throws me off, especially when used after every single message in a very long conversation. Or when it’s at the end of a less polite text, like “wash your dishes x”. Is that actually a nice kiss? It is a passive aggressive kiss? I don’t know and now I’m questioning everything! There’s also apparently very specific politics about the amounts of x’s and what they mean. I just avoid them altogether.  xxx

5)    School disco songs. This one just makes me sad because there are all these songs and dances that everyone else knows and I don’t, but I want to partake! I may know the macarena and the caramel dance but beyond that I have no idea. Also, some of those songs are very weird. 

6)    Why is there no brown cheese? You’ve adopted cuisine from all sorts of countries, and a bunch of international foods are very easily available. I really enjoy that, I just also want to be able to get a hold of some brown cheese, okay? It’s so good and I miss it.